Toyland

 Growing up in the 1950s and 1960s, we didn’t have electronic toys. Instead, we grew our imaginations, and anything was possible.  It was a magical experience for your toys to come alive…and it was very real.  I remember when I began to grow past that stage. Somehow Mother must have known that my toys no longer held their magical powers.  She would often sing these words to me, probably understanding the struggle that children have when they begin to leave behind the make-believe world.

Toyland, toy land
Little girl and boy land
While you dwell within it
You are ever happy there.

Childhood's joy land

Mystic merry toy land

Once you pass its borders

You can ne'er return again.

              ~Christmas song by Doris Day

I didn’t have everything I wanted, but I had plenty. One of my favorite things was a set of Disney characters on wheels that Mother ordered for me from Montgomery Wards.  I waited anxiously for them to arrive and when they did, they were everything I dreamed of.  I played with them for a long time, coveted them and took good care not to break them. I appreciated everything that was given to me and perfected the art of preserving things by storing them perfectly sometimes in the original packaging.  I never wanted anything broken, and if by chance something did break, Mother was the master mind at finding a way to fix it.

The Disney characters on wheels.

https://missfunes.wordpress.com/2012/02/22/disney-vintage-toys-1960s/ 

I also enjoyed playing with toy cars, often making roads in the dirt to drive them along.  Barbie and Ken were VERY popular. I had several of each and two different doll houses for them.  I had complete wardrobes for them and two convertibles to drive them around in. But the doll I loved the most was my troll doll name Massie. These were the rage and mine was special because she had brown natural type hair. This is the only doll that I wish that I had saved, and yet she got left behind at Vernon when Mother and Daddy divorced.  I made clothes for them and had a doll house for them, as well. This was the doll that I played with until I reached the age that the fantasy world was no longer there. A friend/5^th cousin of mine also loved her trolls and we played behind closed doors when we felt that others were no longer playing with dolls.

decorideasid.blogspot.com

 I played with a “Baby Dear” because that was what Paula played with.  They were life-like and we purchased actual baby clothes at Moses for them.  We had cradles with blankets for them and would play mommy for hours. 

Other toys of my childhood:

Chatty Cathy – a doll that would talk when you pulled the string on her back side. She had eyelids that closed and opened.

 Mouse Trap Game – I loved building the sequence during the game to watch the ball navigate all the way through the maze to finally lower the cage that would capture the mouse.

Creepy Crawlers – was a ‘make your own’ creepy crawlers with a metal mold over a heated element. I would pour the gel into the mold, heat it, cool it and then have my own rubbery spiders and centipedes.

Wahoo – a game board to move marbles in order to win. I never had an official game board because I played this with cousins at Mimi’s house in Crowell on a homemade board made by Pappy.

Jacks – I mastered sitting in the floor and throwing the ball up, collecting all the jacks and catching the ball before it hit the floor a second time.  I remember playing this at church camp…sort of like tournament play.

Skating was a popular pastime, but the skates were clunky, no inline skates back them. They were metal affairs that were tightened with a key until they gripped our shoes, usually. I also had a skateboard that I wanted to love but it was difficult to ride because even the smallest pebble would stop the wheels and throw you off.

 Other toys to mention: Tinker toys, Mr. Potato Head, play dough, view masters to view beautiful pictures, etch n sketch, the cootie game to build a spider like animal, pick up sticks, and slinky, of course, but those were basically useless for long time play.

MY BEST FRIEND - MY PAL

 I originally wrote this piece in January 2019. When I realized that Pal was the first thing to come to my mind as a "GodWink", I knew I had to share this on my blog.

I guess my best friend was a dog that adopted me. I get a little teary still thinking about this special dog. Now reflecting back, I see more and more how special my relationship with him was and how he filled a void in a critical time for me.  He was there for me EVERYDAY, and most of the time, I preferred to play with him over my friends.  God certainly knew what He was doing when He place Pal in my life. We had other family dogs: Lassie, which Paula and Bryan placed a rubber band around his neck, only to be found when Mother smelled a really foul odor. He lived but I don’t remember much about him. Then we had Butch, a pug. I was too young to establish a relationship. I guess when Butch died, Mother and Daddy swore off of having a family dog. Until Pal arrived.  He was a mut, and I tried to pretend that I didn’t like him because I knew how much Mother and Daddy didn’t want a dog. But I played in secret with him, and he grew so very fond of me. He followed me everywhere and would not leave.

One Sunday afternoon, Mother and Daddy were determined to get rid of him, so we loaded him up and took him far away, into east Vernon, and let him out of the car.  As we drove off, I looked out the back window and he was running as fast as he could to keep up with the car.  I started howling and bawling my eyes out. Daddy stopped the car, we gathered him up, and from that day forward he was my dog, my PAL! I was probably in the second grade and had never known such loyalty in my life. There was one time when an older teenage girl showed up at our front door and claimed that Pal was her dog. She called him Johnny, and she lived in an apartment complex just across the way.  I cried, but I had to let him go.  Just days later, Pal reappeared, and I suppose they just decided not to search him down again…and he was finally mine! He let me dress him up and place him in my buggy. We took many picnics in an open field together. It was a relationship like no other. During my growing up years, I played many hours outdoors and having Pal as a playmate was the best. He was free to roam outside, until Mother finally agreed to allow him indoors. He would even find me at school and I would call Mother to come pick him up. Once I learned to ride a bike, Pal would follow me everywhere, and if I received permission to ride my bike to the local 7-11 (which was down a busy road), I would leash Pal to my bike and away we would go.

When I began to drive to school, Pal always knew when it was time for me to come home from school. He would position himself in the front yard waiting my return, and when I would drive in, he would follow me around to greet me at the car door.  All my friends knew him well. When we left for college, one friend brought some college friends home. When they were driving around, they came across Pal at the intersection near our home. She rolled down the window and called his name, and they all said, “You DO know everyone and their dogs.” Nothing was the same unless Pal was there to join the fun, which made a couple of Christmas eves a little dicey.  It always seemed that if he ever ran away, he would disappear on Christmas eve, the most special day of the year. I would just be miserable. Family would drive around looking for him, night would fall, Mother would serve our Christmas Eve meal, and I would constantly check the front porch…and then poof, there he would be and I could be happy to open presents.

Pal lived a long life. I was lucky to have him during his prime years. For me that would be from the 2^nd grade until college.  When things fell apart in my home situation, he was there for me. After I left for college, Daddy backed over him one morning, and Mother said Daddy was as white as a ghost when he came in to tell her.  They took Pal to the vet; he lived but was always down in his hind part after that.  And of course, one Christmas, he wandered off..never to return. I knew that he wanted to spare me the pain of physically losing him.  But we never quit scouting the horizon for him, as there had been a sighting of him on the highway to the lake. I often wondered if he was trying to find me.  I loved him; everyone knew I loved him; he was part of me. From that day forward, I have never been without a dog.  Dog spelled backwards is GOD.  They are special critters, indeed.

Godwinks Defined

 An event or personal experience, often identified as coincidence, so astonishing that it is seen as a sign of divine intervention, especially when perceived as the answer to a prayer.

I ordered the book, and before it ever arrived, I was able to read the introduction online. The author advises that you sit in a meditative state and envisioned things or people throughout your life that you believe made an impact on the direction of your life. It was so powerful to me that I purchased 4 more copies to give as gifts to others. Even though it is an older book, I believe that the message is most useful because I have always believed that God intervenes and that everything that happens, happens for a reason. But how well do I listen to His direction?

Below is my list of GodWinks: Dec 7, 2021

God- it all comes back to here. Giving me the ability to forgive. As I made this list, I didn't start here. The first item on my list was my childhood pet, but I had to double back and put God at the top of the list, since I have lived in faith since I was a child. I know that He guides me in everything that I do. I pray to Him often for guidance and comfort.

My heritage – I also had to come back and list this at the top since I am a huge historian for family history. I know that God is in my DNA just by the rich history of all of my ancestors. They lived full rich lives grounded in the faith. I had many preachers in my background and I’m truly their daughter in Christ. Because of them, I reached the place where I am today. Without them, I wouldn’t be here.

 Pal – the best friend that kept me sane as a child Dec 7, 2021. As I truly reflected with my eyes closed back into my past, the first vision I had was of my dog PAL. The name was truly fitting. He was my best friend and kept me sane as a child. When I searched my files, I found that I had already written a tribute to Pal which I will share on this blog tomorrow, but there was much more to his story than I realized when I wrote about him in 2019. 

So here’s the rest of the story and why I know that it was no coincidence that Pal found me:

I had a very hard time adjusting to school in the first grade, as I was a year younger than all the rest (born Aug 31). In second grade, Pal found me and I began to adjust much better to school life, though I had a teacher Mrs. Ricketts who I was a bit afraid of. But Pal grounded me and became my source of daily comfort. Now that I was adjusting better to school and friends and social life, I became a LEADER of my group of friends. In hindsight, I believe it was because I had an older brother who was a star football player and my sister was always the most popular girl and always selected as cheerleader. My parents were up-coming in the community and all of this gave me confidence. This role of being a leader in my cliche of friends continued until the end of 4^th grade.  When we made the transition to 5^th grade to Middle School (different building and location), I found myself at the very bottom of the pile. Though I hate to point fingers, in my soul I feel I know who was responsible for taking me out of the mix. Children can be very brutal to one another due to jealousy.  The “new” ringleader began to ridicule me, taunt me and make fun of me in front of others, and it seemed that ALL followed her lead. It reached a point where I hated to even get out of the car at school and would immediately look for a place out of the way and the taunting that this person subjected me to. I withdrew more and more and tried to stay out of harm’s way. MY PAL was, at that time, the only true friend I felt that I had. When I came home each day, he was there and I would find a place of refuge with him, as I withdrew into my own cocoon. Mother would often tell me to tell them, “Go jump off a bridge.” It rang hollow, as it was just not something practical. But I’m sure she was at wits end with no other idea. I often wondered why someone didn’t save me from this cruel reality, but IN reality, I learned to be tough and appreciate my own worth. I’m not sure that I could have done that without the comfort of my old friend, Pal. Things did improve in the 7^th/8^th grade as we were now anticipating going to high school and becoming cheerleaders. These girls felt that I had something to offer and they began to invite me to the park to “play practice”, but I never regained the same footing, as I was always skeptical of becoming the “whipping boy” again. And then we transitioned to High School and the said ringleader WAS elected cheerleader.  But now I faced a different more personal challenge. And once again, when things grew wretched at home during high school, Pal was there for me….EVERY DAY….keeping me sane.

I never analyzed all of this until WAY later in my life. I just learned how to buck up and move forward. But one day as I sat in teacher training prior to the start of school probably around 2002, we were learning all about bullying, and how to recognize it and prevent it. I don’t think that I have ever had anything affect me in such an ‘ah ha’ moment when I realized that THAT was exactly what I had experienced. I sat in that training with tears in my eyes. I’ve never succumbed to the “oh poor me” attitude, but in that moment, it all became clear that I had been the victim of the brutality of bullying. That person who found a need to bully me changed my life forever. Once again, I’m sure that God had a plan. He knew all along maybe where the ‘other’ road would lead me. But He gave me a PAL to see me through.

Mother – Well, there will be MUCH more about my mother as she was my mother first and my best friend in my adult life. She taught me deeply about life, gave me insight into myself (She often told me good things happen to you because you wait to make a judgement... and people know exactly who you are because it is written on your face.) She taught by proverbializms. These allowed her to express a certain moral given by an unknown narrator to show that in order to overcome doubts and discouragements, one must plug on to navigate life’s problems. She lived by example, without judging me or telling me what to do.

Agape love

Daddy- someone is ALWAYS there for me. More about my precious daddy who loved me with a heart bigger than Texas.

Eventually, I listed 27 more people/events that I believe were Godwinks. I plan to flesh those out and share the blessings given to me by the people who made a difference in my life.

What Is A Godwink?

I’ve always felt that things happen for a reason; I believe in divine intervention. Sometimes I don’t understand it until years later.  Back in the early 2000s when I was teaching middle school, I often heard the parents of my students or those I worked with using the term “God Wink.” Since I know that God has a plan for us, I began to use the term taken from the book written by Squire Rushnell. Here’s how the author defines it:

WHAT'S A GODWINK?

by Squire Rushnell, “The Godwink Guy”

"It was truly a “Godwink” that my first book of hope and encouragement was released just before 9/11, almost as if it was predestined to help a hurting nation. The new word “Godwinks” quickly entered into the language meaning those little “coincidences” that weren't coincidence, but instead, from divine origin. The word itself evolved while writing my first book, When God Winks. I found myself wondering, “If there’s no coincidence to coincidence, what do you call it?” My wonderful wife Louise and I talked and prayed about it for weeks. One day the new little word floated into my consciousness⎯ “Godwink” ... it was fun and friendly like “Godsend” or “Godspeed”.

Recently, I began thinking about God Winks again and grew curious about how to understand “coincidences” or how to know that God is guiding me. Though the author clearly has some outstanding examples from famous people far above my paygrade, he gives us ways to understand how/why things happen in our own lives.

I began with the introduction to the book, reading slowly when p xxii caught my attention.  Once I finished the introduction, I followed Mr. Rushnell's advice and sat with my eyes closed, like in a meditative state, and went back into time as far as my memory would allow and began seeing things as ‘turning events.’  I listed them as quickly as I could, and then I began to journal about them. I can’t lie. My first God Wink was a dog that God persisted that my family acknowledge as my pet. In a childlike way, I named him Pal and only now do I see how deeply symbolic that name was. As I journaled, I sat with tears streaming down my face. My PAL served a purpose in my life. A God Wink.

I’m hoping that in the future, I will be able to determine how God is directing me…in the moment. He brings people, and things, and events into our lives for our greater good. Now with God’s grace, may we see that He is leading the way.

Mama & Papa McNair in Real Life

 The following notes may or may not have been added so I will post them here. These memories are sidenotes from my mother. As I add information about Frank and Ella's adult children, there will be more memories and recollections of this family. It seems as if they were always there for Mimi and Pappy (Ava & J.C. Jones).

Mama and Papa

Papa never did bless Ava’s marriage to Joe Carroll.  Ava was acquainted with an ambitious upcoming young man who Papa knew she would marry.  When she fell in love with Carroll, Papa was adamantly against it.  Papa knew the night that they were going to ask him if they could get married, and he went on to bed before they got home.  They went in to his bedside anyway to ask for his permission.  He said she could if she wanted to, but that he would not bless the marriage.  Papa was a minister and did not even attend the marriage.

When Jo was born, Ella saved her life.  Others, including the doctor, didn’t expect Jo to live to the morning.  Ella worked through the night clearing Jo’s passageways of mucus, etc. and literally breathed life back into Jo.  Jo lived to be 63 years old.  When Carolita was born, Ella and Charles took Jo in order to help Ava, who had 3 infants in diapers.  They taught her to walk, and potty trained her, and when life returned to normal for Ava and Joe, Jo returned home.

Aunt Jo greets them on Sunday morning. There must have been a tremendous bond between the two. 

Papa and Mama didn’t enjoy being around all the kids.  They thought they had no table manners and Mama would tell Ava that if she didn’t know what would become of the kids if she didn’t get a handle on them.

When Ava and Carroll’s house burned down, they traveled that night to the McNair’s in Electra.  The next morning Papa cleaned the children up and combed their hair and took them to get shoes and socks.

They raised EVERYTHING they ate, except for flour, sugar, coffee, corn meal, etc.  They were excellent gardeners and canned most of their food to store for the winter.

            

I love these pictures of Mama McNair. She and Papa lived life earnestly, honestly and with the highest integrity. I'm proud to be their great-granddaughter.

Papa is in God's Hands

 

Papa's Ministry is Recalled

 This news article was in the Vernon Daily Record on 30 April 1967.