Wide Open Spaces

 In my last post, I talked about growing up in the small town of Vernon, Texas. The Dixie Chicks sang a song titled "Wide Open Spaces." This was popular the year that I lost Daddy, 1998. I know how much Mother and Daddy loved me. I remember the day clearly that they drove off and left me at college, but they gave me a strong foundation....in the place that I came from which was in THE WIDE-OPEN SPACES.

WIDE OPEN SPACES

written by Susan Gibson

sung by The Dixie Chicks

Who doesn't know what I'm talking about?

Who's never left home? Who's never struck out?

To find a dream and a life of their own

A place in the clouds, a foundation of stone

Many precede and many will follow

A young girl's dreams no longer hollow

It takes the shape of a place out West

But what it holds for her, she hasn't yet guessed

She needs wide open spaces

Room to make her big mistakes

She needs new faces

She knows the high stakes

She traveled this road as a child

Wide-eyed and grinning, she never tired

But now she won't be coming back with the rest

If these are life's lessons, she'll take this test

She needs wide open spaces

Room to make her big mistakes

She needs new faces

She knows the high stakes

She knows the high stakes

And as her folks drive away, her dad yells, "Check the oil!"

Mom stares out the window and says, "I'm leavin' my girl"

She said, "It didn't seem like that long ago"

When she stood there and let her own folks know

She needed wide open spaces

Room to make her big mistakes

She needs new faces

She knows the high stakes

She knows the highest stakes

She knows the highest stakes (wide open spaces)

She knows the highest stakes

She knows the highest stakes (wide open spaces)

Growing Up In Small Town America Part 7

 WIDE OPEN SPACES

I grew up in Wilbarger County which was organized as a county in 1881 which was only 75 years before I was born there. This western history impacted my formative years because I was raised in a progressive small community which was filled with its own, fairly current, rich history. It became a part of who I am. My great- grandparents were born in the late 1870s and 1880s and my grandparents were born in very early 1900s; most all of them were born in the early stages of Texas’s development. Most of the Texas counties to the west of Vernon were not even formed. The railroad came through in 1886 and much of our existence still revolved around the train in the 50s. Vernon was also on the historic Western Trail at Doan’s Crossing. Still today, Doan’s is celebrated each year with a Doan’s Crossing Picnic. In the early 1960s, Paula and Bryan were selected to participate in this historic event. Paula was a princess (I have some adorable pictures of her) and Bryan was part of a square dancing group that performed. Quanah Parker and the Comanche Indians were common place in our dialogue. The first newspaper was published in 1889, and in a little over 50 years my daddy would own that newspaper. Cattle, sheep, hogs were important to the economy, but when ranchers suffered losses in the 1890s, crop farming became well established in the area, including corn, wheat, oats, and eventually cotton. Cotton became king in the 1920s during the Great Depression, a time that my parents grew up in.  Cotton remained significant, but the oil industry increased and helped offset the losses.

My Pappy, J.C.Jones (Mother’s daddy) grew wheat and cotton, and also hogs. He was a Christian man, a lay minister and a deacon. He was named Conservation Farmer the year before he died.

Framing My World - 9

 Organized

I appreciate order and organization. I’m detail oriented and want things to run smoothly. There’s always more to organize; it’s never ending. I keep lists and try to file properly so I can find things because I hate to reinvent the wheel.

It drives me nuts trying to organize things in my home. Though I’m not a hoarder, I find it difficult to let go of things that I treasure. Derek and I travelled the world and have things from across the globe.  I’m connected to family heirlooms or items that were given to me by someone special, or something that reminds me of a special time.

Homebody

I’m a homebody. It’s where I find peace and comfort. Mother always said there was such a peace within my home. There’s a lot of love here. We communicate well. Derek and I are on the same page. On one of Mother’s trips to the coast, she brought me back a statuette of two gulls flying in tandem. She said that it reminded her of how Derek and I live.

Framing My World - 8

 Fair

I believe in fair-play. Though I was often reminded by Mother “there are no signs over the door that read ‘life is fair’” …I expect others to carry their weight. I have worked hard for what I have. I want others to do the same. I believe in helping people by being a good listener, caring for them emotionally and helping them to find direction. I’m not big on hand-outs, as I’ve never expected anyone to give me things, except Derek J and he gives me everything.

I believe in giving credit where credit is due. If I’m given credit for something that should be directed elsewhere, I go the extra mile to clarify our different roles in receiving that credit. “Credit where credit is due.”

Hard Worker

I’m a worker bee, don’t like the stress of being in charge, I trust my faith that God will lead me to follow the right people. I’m dependable, know my limitations, won’t commit if I don’t feel that I can get the job done. If I do commit, I persevere; follow through with my word of promise to get something done. Any job worth doing is worth doing well. If I give my word, I don’t renege. I do things to the best of my abilities, which means I perseverate because I don’t want to make a mistake, leaving no stone unturned. I’m a perfectionist; I take care of my belongings and they last me a long time; I like things done a certain way. “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

Framing My World - 7

Realist

I think logically, like Mother. She often told me that I have a good head on my shoulders. It’s hard to tolerate people with no common sense. Mother said that people can see through me because I can’t hide my feelings and my face often reveals it all; therefore, I guess I’m predictable. Or maybe she just knew me too well. 

What you see is what you get. I’m down to earth. People know what they can expect from me. 

I try to keep things real. I’m not full of foo-foo and fluff.

Friendships/I Keep My Distance/Guarded

I’m observant and emotionally intuitive, naturally introverted, I’m selective about what people know about me (of course, I spill my guts out to Derek about everything). I value security, mainly in family and close friends. I put every effort into understanding their needs and incorporating that into my need for clarity. Without communication, though, that is difficult.

What you see is what you get, avoid being two faced. It’s hard to be around moody people.

Mother taught me if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

I will not push myself on others. I don’t like liars and can’t tolerate people who mess with my mind. I’m totally out of there for that. 

Framing My World - 6

 Communication

I’m comfortable in my skin, probably because Derek reinforces me and loves me for who I am.

I understand that once words are spoken, they can never be retracted.

I believe in the power of honesty. There are times where a ‘white lie’ is needed to protect someone’s feelings or integrity. For me, it’s not even a lie, but just not saying the whole story.

For me, communication is clarification, but I often find that others don’t communicate well.

Over time I forgive, being careful not to be the victim twice.

I do what I believe is right, using good judgment and common sense competence. I’ve never set out to intentionally hurt someone.

I’m guarded with my words. I hold things inside rather than speak out, most of the time feeling that it is not my place.

Framing My World - 5

 I Think Things Over

I don’t think fast on my feet, but I’m confident in my decision making process.

I absorb things, sometimes for quite a while, until eventually I have a clear vision of the situation. I can see where I’m to blame and where the blame is to be laid elsewhere. I don’t rush to conclusions, oftentimes analyzing my own actions, trying to see what I did to make things worse. Mother always said good things come my way because I don’t react quickly, yet I tend to worry.

I know I’m not always right. There’s more than one way to skin a cat.

I find it difficult to use my words to justify my thinking or defend my position, sometimes lack the confidence to proceed independently, many times leaving things unsaid which is my way of letting God take control.